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Wellness
Published Wednesday May 16, 2018 by Robyn Costanzo

Is Your Therapist a Good Fit for You?

Expert Advice
Personal Growth

Most mental health professionals agree that when a patient and therapist really connect, a positive outcome follows. So, what does a good match look like? Since many therapy sessions address confusion surrounding our personal relationships, it only makes sense that we question the relationship with our therapist, too.

When it comes to finding a professional to confide in, most of us have the nuts and bolts covered—location, availability, fees, credentials, types of therapy offered, etc. But, how do we know we’ve found “the one”? While you might not find the perfect therapist, we can (and should) try to gauge the “goodness-of-fit” we have with that person.

Goodness-of-fit can vary from moment-to-moment, and stage-to-stage, so you may experience your therapist differently at various points in times. Some people work with the same therapist intermittently over a lifetime, while others engage with several therapists. No matter your experience, finding a good fit can be a challenge—unless you know what to ask yourself.

These four, straight-forward questions can help you determine if you’ve found a good match:


Question #1: Do I want to come back?

This is an easy one to answer when it comes to most situations. Engaged, nonjudgmental, empathetic—yes, yes, yes—all objective qualities that make for a great therapist. What does this translate to though? If the trend includes feeling safe, understood, and that returning to talk more will be helpful, these are indicators you’re currently working with a therapist who is right for you. Therapy requires us to dive deep into difficult and uncomfortable aspects of our lives, so it’s crucial to feel create a foundation of trust.


Question #2: Am I managing things more efficiently?

Making progress with your therapist isn’t necessarily about your life improving. It’s about your ability to cope with life improving. Hey, things change over the course of therapy—you might move, become ill, or experience a loss of some kind. But, if you notice that situations which used to make your blood boil now lead to more of a simmer, that’s another positive sign you found the right therapist for you.


Question #3: Can my therapist admit when he or she messed up?

A therapist’s ability to own up to their flaws is critical. Like any human being, we have times when we struggle or drop the ball. Your therapist should be able to receive negative feedback from you. Some do this with more ease than others, but we expect it. Sometimes we even invite it.


Question #4: What if I don’t think I’m working with the right therapist?

Your therapist should be able to discuss this uncertainty with you. There’s a range of comfort levels in this regard. The conversation should either confirm your decision to move on or help you reconsider it. If you’re met with defensiveness, there’s your answer. Your therapist might help you realize that wanting to end the work is really about a difficult topic coming up in the treatment. You might decide to stick around or return when you feel more ready.

After you’ve asked the questions, it’s okay to see your therapist on a trial run basis. If it doesn’t feel right, keep looking. That therapist might not be a “good fit” but, with time, someone else will be! 

Robyn Costanzo
Written by
Robyn Costanzo
Contributor | Licensed Clinical Social Worker
About the author
Completing an intensive post-graduate training program in psychoanalytic psychotherapy, Robyn provides online therapy to working women while residing with her young family in Armonk, New York.
what is wellness
Wellness
Published Wednesday Oct 06, 2021 by Denise Prichard

What is Wellness?

Expert Advice
Wellness

To say the last year and a half was tough would be an understatement. In fact, it will probably go down as one of the most difficult times for our modern generation. In one of the many social polls we conducted during the pandemic, some of you described this time as a sheer “dumpster fire” or “like stepping on a Lego.” And to be honest, I couldn’t agree more.

Luckily, we’ve been able to get back to some form of normalcy in our lives and wellness routines over the last several months. As vaccines became available to the public, wellness businesses welcomed fitness fanatics, haircut seekers, and massage lovers back to in-person wellness experiences. And thank goodness for that—my roots and horrible posture from working from my bed were both getting wildly out of control. This girl needed a good massage and cupping session stat.

If there’s one thing we learned from the pandemic, it’s that our wellness routines are as personal as they are important. During shelter-at-home, those routines looked a bit different. For many, it meant taking a new approach to the “typical” wellness services we count on—I’m looking at you DIY haircuts, at-home waxing sessions (ouch!), and virtual swerking classes.

Now that we can leave our humble abodes to take advantage of in-person experiences again, the word “wellness” has seemingly taken on a new meaning.

Recently, we conducted another one of our famous social polls to see what wellness means to you, our Mindbody community, now that we're slowly but surely getting back to our regularly scheduled programming. We also tapped some of our most influential Mindbody business owners about the ever-evolving wellness landscape.

Here’s what you all had to say.

Wellness is more important to you than ever

According to our annual Mindbody Wellness Index, 60% of Americans say they’re more focused on their health and wellness since COVID. Consumers are now realizing they need to take greater care of themselves to optimize and preserve their health. When we asked you on Instagram how important wellness is, a whopping 98% said it was more important than ever. When it comes to how you’re practicing wellness, though, the answers were all over the board. Many of you pointed to journaling, practicing breathwork, and daily workout routines (cycling and yoga topped the list) as being the activities that help you keep your chill throughout the week.

I’m also happy to report that over 50% said you tend to feel more blessed than stressed on a daily basis—which is more than likely a big improvement. Let’s be honest, a year ago I would’ve bet a billion dollars that 99.9% of us knew no other feeling than anxiety—am I right? But even with the stress in our lives dwindling, many of you are still experiencing burnout at the end of a long work week (guilty!). But instead of succumbing to a bottle of wine for relief (please, that was so 2020), you’re unwinding by going to your favorite workout classes—with hot yoga, barre, and Pilates as your faves.

What wellness means to the pros

Let’s be honest, we should credit the business owners in this space for helping us reignite our spark when it comes to our wellness routines, right? Thanks to them, we’ve been inspired to prioritize the activities that help us feel our best. In turn, we thought it’d be interesting to learn what wellness means to them—and how that definition has changed over the past eighteen months.

Here’s what they had to say.

“Wellness is living in balance—mind, body, spirit. Highs and lows. It all ebbs and flows and we can navigate it a bit better when we take time to move, breath and remember who we are, and how we are connected to this big, beautiful world.” - Jess Pierno, Founder, Owner, and Chief Inspiration Officer of Yoga Heights

“Wellness is a true balancing of the mental, physical, and spiritual. It has definitely evolved over the years for me—from something that I just thought was about exercising and eating a healthy diet—to also incorporating balancing and healing internally and spiritually.” - Stefanie Patterson, Owner, Indianapolis Salt Cave and Halotherapy Center

“My sense of wellness has evolved from staying healthy and motivated, mind/body/spirit... to being more gentle with myself, less demanding. Accepting my limitations, taking time for resting, and gaining real clarity about what's important. I care less about what people think of me—difficult as a performer and as a business owner with so many demands on me—and more about getting quiet and tapping into the divine source inside of me that helps me discern my next move. In this way, I know my motives are as pure as possible and I'm not getting distracted—not that I don't make mistakes! Those are necessary, that's how we learn!” - Johanna Krynytzky, Owner, Hip Expressions Belly Dance Studio

“My studio name reminds us that we are constantly evolving. The past 18 months have certainly shown us that! Wellness to me means doing your best on any given day to make sure that you are taking care of yourself as best you can. It leads to resilience. Diet, exercise, sleep, a sense of community, and some form of faith. It all matters. Setbacks happen all the time, and every day is a chance to start again. We strive to be 'cheerleaders' for our clients when we sense that things are coming out of balance in their lives. So many have been with us for 18 years and are friends—they are our community and we all watch out for each other.” - Mo Wolfe, Owner and Founder, Evolution Pilates

Putting wellness into action

I think we can all agree that there isn’t one true definition of wellness anymore. To some of us, it means getting that hot yoga sesh in daily, and to others, it means carving out time to treat ourselves to a massage or manicure. As long as you’re actively pursuing wellness—whatever that means to you—you're on the right track.

Our MO has always been about connecting the world to wellness—a term that's seen a lot of change lately. Whether you’re fully embracing the in-person experience or still delighted by the convenience of practicing at-home wellness, the Mindbody app makes it easy for you to book experiences that help you feel like YOU again.

denise prichard
Written by
Denise Prichard
Senior Marketing Content Specialist
About the author
Denise Prichard is a certified yoga instructor (RYT-200) and an experienced content marketing professional with a penchant for writing compelling copy within the health, wellness and beauty industries. When she isn't writing or editing, you can find her teaching yoga classes, at a spin class or hanging out with her rescue pups.